Raise your hand if you're over this shit. Now, put your hand down, cause I can't see you and I probably won't be able to for another 74920573 days. But don't fret, I still look like the same ten I have always been and I still say absurd and inappropriate things 24/7. With that being said, I will address 5 annoying things that I'm sure you all will agree has been driving you crazy during this pandemic. 1. STUPIDITY- I don't even know where to begin but suddenly my timeline now consists of normal ass people who are all of the sudden: scientists, conspiracists, journalists & psychics. "Sit down Sandra, you do not know that this is going to end next week and they have a vaccine that Hank told you about." There's false news going around everywhere and it's best to just listen to ME. I know everything, Carole Baskin has given me the 411. U R WELCOME 2. TMI- Too Much Info! I know way too much about y'all now. I've now seen about 3 people I follow still have their damn CHRISTMAS TREE up. It is March 49th and I'm going to need you to take it down immediately. 3. YOUR DIET- Now I'm not a nutritionist but I do have common sense. If you are posting your meal of pizza, hot dogs and cookies err night I am deeply concerned. Do ya'll know that shit gives you love handles with a side of diabetes? 4.SPELLING CHAMP- it is spelled "q-u-a-r-A-n-t-i-n-e" not "quarentine". YOU ARE WELCOME! 5. THOSE DAMN CHALLENGES- Ok, so Sarah nominated Amanda who nominated Grace who nominated Anna who has to do 4 squats. NO, I nominate y'all to create an OnlyFans and post that shit on there. Thank you for reading, I always love feedback feel free to comment your thoughts. I have time to read them, so I shall respond.
XoXo, Hella Haley
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Alright, since we can't put 2020 in rice, we can do some other shit during this pandemic. Is your blessed ass quarantined? or your work is shutdown?? What is one supposed to do? 😱 Hella Haley here, to offer a few suggestions‼️ 1. SELF CARE- Guuuuurrrrl, if you do not take this time to level up and treat yo self. Then what's the point? This is your time to indulge in face masks, hair masks, lip scrubs and come out of this quarantine lookin like the fiiiiiine thang that your are! 💁🏼♀️And if you're not self-caring in Beauty Kitchen's all-natural beauty products then what you doin? 🤷🏼♀️SHOP NOW → beautykitchen.net/ 2. 69 WITH A DIME- This is the time to get nasssstyyyyy. If you aint, bumpin and grindin and experimenting then you just wasting precious time sweetie. And when I say experimenting, I mean taking your love making to a whole new level 📈Thank goodness for Apothecary Stores, they have a CBD Intimate bundle, with ALLLLL the goods to make an unforgettable night 😉TAKE A LOOK → CLICK HERE 3. FIND A HOBBY BETCH- Whether it's making those annoying ass Tik Toks or writing me a love poem, then you're gonna lose your mind. Y'all need to find a hobby that you enjoy and waste an hour or seven. Just for the sake of your sanity 🙌🏽 4. CLEAN- If you're going to be stuck at your home (if you have one) then you might as well re-organize and throw out all that unnecessary shit you've been holding onto. There's nothing more therapeutic than having a clean, messy free home. 5. TURN UP- Yo, this is the time to brunch with yo pals. Grab the squad and make some memories while drinking your liver away. For all you Las Vegas peeps, The Stove in Henderson is open and they have Chambongs and bomb-ass food to get the partayyyy started! If you've never tried a chambong I suggest you try one IMMEDIATELY!
I’ve made some amazing friends throughout the years and some CUUHHHRAZZY ones. Moving around from state to state since living in Sacramento I was forced to make friends cause I knew NO ONE! But the friends I have made turned into fam-ILY. (Only cause mama wasn't there to hold her lil girl) 😉 In this blog, I will address 5 things you need to do to be a top notch friend. 1. BE ONE HUNNID- Be honest to your friends. If you’re friend is being a dumb bitch and continuing to go back to their loser ex. Tell them, don’t sugar coat that ish. I am a little too honest sometimes. But hey, I’d rather say it to their beautiful face than behind their back 🤷🏼♀️ 2. DON'T SLEEP/FLIRT WITH THEIR PARTNER- Leave that drama for the Maury show. There’s 84737283 people in the world, all you have to do is keep your legs closed. 🙅🏼♀️ 3. ASK ABOUT THEM AND HOW THEY'RE DOING- If your homie just went on a dope ass yacht trip around Greece, ask how their trip was and why they didn’t bring you?... In other words, check in on them every now and then and make sure they aren't about to have a mental breakdown and decide to get bangs. 4.MAKE SACRIFICES- If you have had 69 minutes of sleep and your bff needs you. you are going to need to sacrifice your zzzzzz’s and go help them with whatever they got themselves into now. 5. LET THEM KNOW YOU LOVE 'EM- Let the homie know you care about them. Just say “yo I appreciate you not judging me when I drank that whole bottle of 1942, I love you bb”
8/22/2019 1 Comment 4 Things NOT To Do At A Pool PartyGirl moves to Vegas, has a Saturday off. What does she do? Go to a pool party, duh! 🤗Who better to tell you what not to do at a pool party than a local herself. I'm not saying I'm a pro and go every weekend but . . . . since moving 5 years ago for school, I've accumulated some suggestions of what NOT to do at one. 1. Do NOT get in the pool- Sweetie, the pool is for aesthetics. I advise you not get in that murky, pee infested water. But you best believe you should take some pics by it! 💁🏼♀️📸 2. Do NOT die- This is no joking manner. It is hot af in Vegas 100+ degrees and we do not need anyone getting dehydrated and overheated. Drink yo water. And always keep an eye on those friends that always get Becky wasted. 3. Do NOT wear wedges- K, when you're 21 and you're excited you buy some cork, tan wedges. Honey, ima need you to trade those in for some cute sandals. Ain't no one trying to break their toe from your high ass wedge. If you need cute sandal suggestions, try Old Navy they're 2 for $10 😂 4. Do NOT Splash- If you decide to break rule #1 and get in the pool. Do everyone who attempted to do their makeup a favor and not splash the water. It will result in 49579075 girls screaming at you. Thank you for reading, I hope you did not get offended. But, I also do NOT care if you do. With all being said, stay safe and party on. Feedback is always welcomed. Let me know if there's any other blog topic ideas you may have. 🤗
In case you haven't heard from any basic betch, Coachella is around the corner! I'm so stoked to spend so much money and sweat my (perky) ass off in the desert, are you? 🙃Welp, whether you're going or not, expect to hear about it for the next 2 weeks. Starting with this amazing blog by M-E! 💁🏼♀️ In this blog I will discuss what to expect this 'Chella 2019 for those dope ppl that are attending 🧚🏻♀️ 1. The Battle of the Weekends- Weekend 1 is better! No! Weekend 2! C'mon we all know weekend 1 is the best. How about we save all your opinions and energy for Facebook where ppl post their political views and force you to join their pyramid scheme. 2. Social Media Overload- Expect your news feed bombarded with Chella posts. Be ready to watch crappy videos of short peasants in the back snapping all the headliners. 3. Glitter Errwhere- With trends changing and the evaporation of flower crowns, glitter is in. It'll be like a unicorn sh*t on a bunch of girls 😂So put your shades on and be ready to be blinded by bright metallics and shiny silver 🕶 4. Diet- Set your alarm so you can remind yourself to eat 🌭Every Coachella I have attended I came back lean af 💀This year I am setting an alarm to feed myself. U R WELCOME. 5. Pace Yourself- DO NOT be an amateur and go too hard on Thursday and not make it to Friday. I thought this would be common sense but this happens to 9375984237 ppl every year. I don't get it 🤔 6. loSt- Expect to be lost, not only in life but at the polo fields. If you have to get a leash so you don't lose your squad then Amazon prime has plenty. It is inevitable to try and find your mates. They will say they are by the bunny that looks like Lizzie McGuire and you will have no idea what or where that is. 7. Basic'ness- Expect to see a lot of clones. For example, Fashion Nova matching sets and Filas everywhere. If you want to play a wicked game, take a shot for every fringe you see. 😂 Thank you for reading, let's get hyphy! 🕺I'll meet you at Do-Lab! 💦🔫
P.s. Coachella does not have daycare so all you baby mamas and baby daddies who are going, stay home and take care of yo babies 👏🏽 @kyliejenner 1/17/2019 0 Comments 7 Interesting Things About ChinaWHO WANTS TO LEARN ABOUT CHINA? If you haven’t been watching my insta-stories on your big screen recently, then you may know I recently traveled to China. Why???? Because, a good friend of mine from Texas recently moved there to teach. Her name is Vanessa and she is the dopest person you will eva meet. Fun fact: She took my first festival virginity (Shout out to Vanessa, all my money goes to festivals now lol) In this blog, I will list 7 things, that Jen (this hottie I get to travel the world with, who happens to be single 😉) and I found interesting about our travels in Shanghai. 1. THERE WERE CAMERAS ERR WHERE 👀- As you may already know, the Chinese government can be a lil cray cray. As you walk along the streets in the city and subways, there’s literally cameras everywhere! Vanessa would always say “The government is literally watching and listening to us at all times.” Welp if that's the case then they definitely heard some absurd things, especially from my mouth 🤭😂 You’re welcome China for the free comedy 😂 2. IT IS ILLEGAL TO GET OUT ON THE LEFT SIDE – There is no Uber in China, they have an alternative app called ‘DiDi’. When we would get out of the car, we could not get out on the left side or we’ll get our foot chopped off. (lol. Not really, but probably) 3. COMPULSIVE STARING- Us being three HAWT fairer skin Americans, we definitely did not blend in. Every room we walked in, subways we took, cars we got in, they would stare 👀 Like no shame at all, and when you catch them staring they wouldn’t look away to play it off. They just continue to stare. Unfortunately, it didn’t stop there, they would take pictures without your permission. LIKE UM, CAN I AT LEAST POSE?🕺 4.SHOPPING MALLS AND BOUTIQUES EVERYWHERE! 🛍- Every other store was “Fashion!, Fashion!, Fashion!” stores. They love their shopping there but of course I was like a plus size there 🙄 5. CLEAN AF- The cities and subway were clean af. There was someone, a worker, always cleaning the streets. Forbid there’s dust in a corner. It’s crazy clean, my mom would love it. #NeatFreak P.s. It’s a little ironic because the pollution there is the worst I’ve ever seen, you could barely see the sky. 6. DISNEYLAND!!!!!!- Shanghai Disney opened in 2016, it’s the newest Disney in the world. It was so much fun, I HIGHLY recommend going when we did. We went on a cold Saturday in January. Because it was so cold, it wasn’t crowded or busy. We were livin VIP but paid general admission. Waited only 5 minutes for rides and all the rides were so advanced. Our fave was ‘TRON’ it was like we were gliding through air, an actual representation of someone sliding in your DM’s 😂🛸 7. NO SOCIAL MEDIA – Upon arriving to China you HAVE to download a VPN. (an app that allows you to use IG, Twitter, Facebook). China controls their internet and limits what their citizens can use. For example, you can’t even use Google. They use ‘Bing’. They block all social media, so you def can’t be an instamodel there 🙄 Thankfully we were able to update our fans through our VPN and could connect to the world 😂 All in all the trip was fun and very eye-opening. I would definitely recommend traveling and touring this ‘different’ country. But good luck getting a visa, they ain’t tryna have anyone enter their country. It was difficult but hey we did it! 💁🏼♀️
It's that time of the year, are you ready? 🏈 I'm not. But IT'S FINE! 💁🏼♀️Some of you are probably reading this expecting highlights and stats of the season. Well you're def at the wrong place, I'm here to express to you from MY point of view (a girl with little football knowledge) of what I expect to see for all of the months to come. 1. EVERYONE ON YOUR TIMELINE IS AN ESPN NEWS REPORTER- Okay, but for real. Since when did everyone become football connoisseurs? 🤷🏼♀️ Apparently they can fully understand where the team went wrong and what they need to do to improve. "Okay, gotchya Coach couch potato 🥔🏈" 2. MEMES FOR DAYS - Meme's are gonna be at an all time high! 📈 The limit will not exist. It's funny cause I don't understand some football related memes and in the beginning I used to always have Doug explain to me. Then, I gave up because I still don't get it. There's literally so much context behind it. Like you have to know exactly what John did in their 5th season, game 8 at the 3rd quarter. 3. FOOTBALL PLAYING 24 HOURS ON THE TV - Don't start a new tv series because you will never finish it. 🙅🏼♀️ There's like a different game on every week. You can probably watch a movie on Tuesday or Wednesday but other than that you're stuck with football. 4. BROKEN FRIENDSHIPS- Every football fan has THEIR team. And since there's like 79849507325 teams, not everyone is going to like the same team. So expect Chad to be mad at Brad because the Ravens beat the Seahawks. 💔 5. ALCOHOLISM- I think somehow it became mandatory to have a cold one during the game. Well like I pointed out earlier, football is on 24 hours. ⏱And some people take advantage of that and get crunk on the regular. 🍻
8/14/2018 0 Comments 5 Ways to Be A Bad BetchGrowing up is annoying and tiring but why not be a bad betch while doing it! 👊🏽There's nothing sexier than a woman who has their shit together. Am I right? or am I right? In this blog I will address 5 ways to improve your bad ass image and be a bad betch! 🤸🏼♀️ 1. TAKE CARE OF YOUR HEALTH- Whether it's drinking that Yogi tea and cleansing your dark soul or going to the gym, it is important to put your health and body first. In order to be a bad betch you need to look like a "baddie" a.k.a. Hottie/potential fashion nova model 👙Just don't overdue this look and end up resembling a Kardashian 🍑 Being fit and toned will make you bad to da bone 😎As someone who was once 157 lbs and now 130 lbs, I know it's possible 💪🏼 2. CONFIDENCE- There's a difference between knowing you're the shit and acting like you're the shit ⚖️It's important to BE confident with out being cocky. 🙅🏼♀️Having confidence allows you to be a more positive and an overall happy person. Being confident is such an important factor in being a bad betch because nothing will stop you from getting you want! 💪🏼Example, I was confident enough I could pull off being blonde, look at me now 💁🏼♀️ Breaking necks err where I go. 3. INDEPENDENCE- Being okay alone and not having to rely on some one is the baddest you can get. 💁🏼♀️No one wants a needy betch. Tie your hair up, turn some Bay Area slappers on and do what you gotta do! 💪🏼Webbie couldn't have said it any better "She got her own car, Two jobs, work hard, you a bad broad" 🏆 4. SET GOALS- If you have no goals then you have nothing to work for. Setting goals for yourself, gives you a reason to work hard and stay focused. 🏆Make sure to be realistic about your goals, don't strive to high or you will end up stagnant. 👏🏽I can already tell you what your next goal is. . . . BEIN A BAD BETCH 🤸🏼♀️ 5. HAVE FUN- Last but certainly not least, HAVE FUN! 🎉It's so easy to get so caught up in your busy, chaotic routine you forget to enjoy life! Book that trip to an exotic island and take that beach pic of you looking away while holding a cocktail that tastes gross, but you wanted to try it cause it was called "Sun-kissed Jungle Juice" 🍹 With all these factors in mind, you too can become a bad betch 💁🏼♀️ Thank you for reading, I always enjoy feedback. Don't hesitate to reach out!
XoXo, Hella Haley You all have asked and I am finally delivering! Some of y'all nosey people want to know how my annoying/crazy/hilarious ass has not scared off my beloved boyfran. In other words, people are curious as to how Doug and I maintain a healthy, happy relationship for SoOoOo long. 4.5 years to be exact 🤫I am going to break down to you 5 things that are key to any and every relationship. 1. T-R-U-S-T- Ain't nobody got time for some insecure, jealous person. You better trust your bae or your relationship is gonna be the biggest headache eva. 🤦🏼♀️In order to trust your lover, you have to be happy with yourself. If you're not happy with yourself then how are you gonna share happiness with someone else? 🤔 2.ATTENTION- It is IMPORTANT to show and give attention in any relationship. A random text or listening about how their day was, can go a long way. If your bae is anything like me, just get their attention with food and puppies! 😂 3. COMMUNICATION- I can't stress how important communication is in any relationship. Telling your bae what is on your mind or what bothers you can prevent arguments and disagreements. If you have 2 ears and a mouth you are capable of communicating! Ain't nobody a mind reader, spit it out! 🗣 4. BE THEIR NUMBER 1 FAN- Seeing your bae happy should make you happy. If I get excited that I just killed the worlds largest fly, YOU BETTA JUMP YO ASS UP AND DOWN AND CLAP FOR ME! 👏🏽Support your bae in all their decisions and actions except if it's illegal, don't support them. Call the cops. 🚔🤙 5. PASSION- Last, but sure as hell not least. If you need to sit online all day and study 50 shades of grey then so be it. Because, physical love is the best love! #HappyHumpDay I'm not an expert or genius, this is what I have learned and what has helped my man and I get through tough times and enjoy all the good times! Thank you for reading!
xoxo, Hella Haley 5/16/2018 0 Comments 5 Things NOT to Do at a FestivalBreak out the glitter betches, it's festival season! 🎡✌🏼Festivals are not for everyone, but I encourage you to attend one if you've never been! Use promo code: "FestivalVirgin" 😂jk Although, I'm no PLUR (Peace, Love, Unity, Respect) expert, I do have my fair share of festival memories. In this blog, I will address 5 things that you should NOT do at a festival. I have gathered my festival squad's thoughts and opinions and came up with these tips. I guarantee 69% of you will agree with these and if you don't then you are probably guilty 🤦🏼♀️ 1. DO NOT IG STORY THE WHOLE FESTIVAL - No one is gonna sit there and watch you from GA holding your phone up while singing along in the background. I can't tell you how many times I've pressed next, next, next, next. Although, maybe a couple posts will do of your favorite sets but no need to stand there and hold your phone up the WHOLE time. Instead, just post yourself dancing/twerking. 🕺 2. DO NOT WEAR A FLOWER CROWN - K, flower crowns were dope in 2010 when we didn't know any better. But, we have moved on to bigger and better things like buns on our heads and Fiddler hats 🙌🏽 3. DO NOT GET TOO WA$TED - Ain't nobody got time fo' dat! It is VERY, VERY important to pace yourself. Festivals are long af and it is vital that you do not go TOO hard at the pre-game. I can't tell you how many times I've seen fools not even make it to the festival or are getting escorted out of the festival. Every squad should have a squad mom (most responsible friend) and if you don't, then find one LOL! 4. DON'T WEAR A BASKETBALL JERSEY - Festivals are a way for you to express yourself with unique & weird fashion. Why be basic AF and wear a basketball jersey. If Alyssa and I could write fashion tickets to everyone at Austin City Limits who had one on, we'd run out of pen and paper. If I see you with one, I will ask you "What time is your game tonight?" cause you must be ready to play! ⛹️♀️ 5. DON'T WEAR UNCOMFORTABLE SHOES - It is crucial that you wear comfy AF shoes but not ugly ones. The amount of walking/standing/twerking you do at a festival makes you want to write an apology letter to your poor feet. I've had friends (Whit) spend 40 minutes of her "getting ready" time, performing first-aid care on her blisters. Adidas, Nikes, Balenciaga, Yeezy, even Sketchers are just some brands that will make you feel like your walking on cloud 9. With that being said, have a great time! And be sure to reach out to me if you have any suggestions or comments. I love feedback! 🙌🏽
XOXO, Hella Haley |
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